this character on Whitechapel who looks exactly like me down to the hair cut and colour and piercings

whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat why am I on the telly

hotter than ur faves

because vive la republique

Note to Dan: I take approximately 0% of anything seriously.

the English language is not something I take lightly.

all browsers come with spell checkers, you have literally no excuse.

nah I just get out of bed bed, bring everything into the living room and pull out the sofa bed.

I have black bedsheets and also green and pink floral bedsheets

I am apparently intersexed.

wow.

I have done literally nothing all day except get my nails done and watched Community.

like, literally two bumholes?

I'm so intrigued but not sure if I want more details.

Matty_the_Emo_Slayer wrote:

Finnvitka wrote:seriously there are more poisonous spiders in Australia than anywhere else why would you live there

drive thru off licences

huh, so that'll be why the number of alcoholics is ridiculously high over there then

emergency contraception only works up to 72 hours after intercourse ie before the egg has a chance to implant ie before the woman is actually medically definable as pregnant.

god Rob Lowe y so sexy Rob Lowe.

hey kids

condoms might not be fun for you for the two minutes you're actually in the act of having sex

but dick rot is even less fun and lasts a lot longer

keep your dick from going gangrenous

use a rubber.