A free-for-all thread

Put the world to rights here (off-topic discussion)
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Sherry
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What would you choose..?

Postby Sherry » Wed Sep 06, 2006 10:13 pm

A man wakes up in hospital, bandaged from head to foot. The doctor

comes in and says "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness.
Now you probably won't remember but you were in a pile-up on the
motorway.
Now you're going to be OK, you'll walk again, everything, but
something
happened.

I'm trying to break this gently but your p@nis was chopped off in
the
wreck and we were unable to find it." Now the bloke groans a bit
but
the doctor goes on "But it's going to be alright, we have the
technology
now
to build you a new one that will work as well as your old one did,

better in fact. But the thing is, it doesn't come cheap.
It's a thousand pounds an inch". The bloke perks up at this, even

though it's a thousand pounds an inch. "So the thing is" the
doctor
says, " it's for you to decide how many inches you want. But it's
something you'd better discuss with your wife.

I mean, if you had a five inch one before and you decide to go for
a
nine incher she might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine
inch
one before and you decide only to invest in a five incher this
time she
might be disappointed. So it's important that she plays a vital
role
in helping you make the decision."

So the bloke agrees to talk with his wife and the doctor comes
back
the next day. "So" says the doctor "Have you spoken with your
wife?".
"I have " says the fellow. "And has she helped you in making the
decision?". "She has" says the bloke.
"And what is it?" asks the doctor. . .
..
..
..



The bloke looks up and says "We're having a new kitchen
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Black Utopia
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Postby Black Utopia » Sat Sep 09, 2006 5:30 pm

...and presenting...

Fuckup of the year on video!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7TLlZlPnkA

The out of tune guitars, the sloppiness... the classic fall at the start.

I LOL'ed. :lol:

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Dream Thief
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Postby Dream Thief » Sat Sep 09, 2006 5:55 pm

That is fucking legendary!! :lol:

If I thought for one minute that might happen on the upcoming UK tour I'd be there like a shot!!
Go now brave warrior don't look back
the stars will guide you through the night
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Lisa McNally
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Postby Lisa McNally » Sat Sep 09, 2006 6:06 pm

I thought they managed really well to recover ... and the sound was pants but not down to them ... I presume the blame for that can be laid elsewhere!

Great that they are getting coverage in the States! I don't think we will see them at BS or BOA again unless they headline ... and I for one think that would be great for the festival! :yes:

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lars_ulrichs_blister
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Postby lars_ulrichs_blister » Sat Sep 09, 2006 7:49 pm

Yuss!! watching last night of the proms on the beeb, love it!!!
If God is black then he is Samuel L Jackson

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Lee Bloodstock
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Postby Lee Bloodstock » Sat Sep 09, 2006 7:57 pm

Really, cos I've got it on the radio at work and I'm fucking hating it :lol:
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lars_ulrichs_blister
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Postby lars_ulrichs_blister » Sat Sep 09, 2006 8:13 pm

Sammi Curr wrote:Really, cos I've got it on the radio at work and I'm fucking hating it :lol:


:lol: :lol:

TBH im just waiting for the 'classics' pardon the pun!! jerusalem and all the pomp and circumstance!!!
If God is black then he is Samuel L Jackson

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StormBitch
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Postby StormBitch » Sat Sep 09, 2006 9:15 pm

Black Utopia wrote:...and presenting...

Fuckup of the year on video!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7TLlZlPnkA

The out of tune guitars, the sloppiness... the classic fall at the start.

I LOL'ed. :lol:


You forgot the miming ;)

I snored. :D

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Lee Bloodstock
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Postby Lee Bloodstock » Sat Sep 09, 2006 9:29 pm

Miming? :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Heralder
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Postby Heralder » Sun Sep 10, 2006 7:10 am

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dwLAPM83ayU

Even dogs can get tourettes :o :lol:
Knights hear the call
It is deep inside us all
We are fighting for glory and steel
We will ride till the dawn
We are children of the storm
All by one we are Freedom Warriors

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jackcake
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Postby jackcake » Sun Sep 10, 2006 9:45 pm

Fuck Carcraft! :cuss:

They phoned on Friday to say my new car was ready for collection. Great. They phoned again at 10:30 this morning to say there's a fault on the car and they won't let me have it, but if I go up to the site and look around they'll see what they can do on a similar car.

So I went up with Dad, saw a Saxo I liked the look of. After a test drive I agreed to buy for £4,000, £600 more than the original car but they left me alone for so long to think about it that I decided it was no good to me. In the end they offered me another car for £5,000 that I've seen £250 cheaper via their website.

Noticed how the prices have gone up each time?

It looked a nice easy deal. A good car that I liked at a fair price suffers a mystery fault and the alternatives go up in price each time. I'll be getting my deposit back and looking elsewhere. I'm in no huge rush and have plenty of time to find the right car. Bloody annoying though!
Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Last.fm

Ross
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Postby Ross » Wed Sep 13, 2006 8:42 pm


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bungle
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Postby bungle » Thu Sep 14, 2006 12:36 pm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pTkltmPyvOs

saw this on bbc news this morning and nearlly pissed myself


you may need to watch it twice. frist time watch were the ball goes to start with. then keep ur eyes on the ball boy with the green top.
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jackcake
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Postby jackcake » Fri Sep 15, 2006 5:08 pm

Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Last.fm

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Big D
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Postby Big D » Fri Sep 15, 2006 6:36 pm

jackcake wrote:http://www.holymoly.co.uk/oops.mp3

:eyes:


Funny. But sad. But funny. But sad. Argh.