The Relationships Thread

Put the world to rights here (off-topic discussion)
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*red*
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Postby *red* » Mon Jul 30, 2007 10:16 am

I'm still single damn it.
Went out saturday all burlesque style, corset, stockings, long skirt... no interest.

Ummm Maybe I should just slum it in trainers and jeans.

One of my mates did say that I am pretty and men find that intimidating WTF?
so you will only talk to ugly girls cos you have a better chance??

I'm not saying I'm pretty (and don't think that I am) but I want to know why on earth do men think that?


Just chat to a girl. If I'm not interested I will still chat. I have made many good mates that way.
any you never know ;) if you don't try
]I'm dyslexic and have trouble spelling. Please do not correct me.

I try my best...sometimes for you spelling nazis that is not enough

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Bauul
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Postby Bauul » Mon Jul 30, 2007 10:33 am

*red* wrote:I'm still single damn it.
Went out saturday all burlesque style, corset, stockings, long skirt... no interest.


To be honest, and this is only my feeling's on the matter, everyone else may disagree, but that would intimidate me a little. Being approchable is far more important to most guys than raw sex appeal, especially when you're both probably quite nervous about it. Wearing stuff that screams "SEX!!" at everyone (which imho, the above mentioned outfit does) probably does intimidate guys, it'd certainly intimidate me. How would a girl react if a guy walked into a bar with a waxed, oiled chest and nothing but loin skin undies on?

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Postby *red* » Mon Jul 30, 2007 10:36 am

I surpose.
But it don't scream sex.
I'm a goth who liikes dressing up.
I dn't always dress this way. Just on occassions.

I understand it can be intimidating but I'm not that scary. I wear "normal" clothes all week. I feel that nights out give me a chance to be fancy.

May try casual this week.
]I'm dyslexic and have trouble spelling. Please do not correct me.

I try my best...sometimes for you spelling nazis that is not enough

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Big D
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Postby Big D » Mon Jul 30, 2007 12:07 pm

*red* wrote:One of my mates did say that I am pretty and men find that intimidating WTF?
so you will only talk to ugly girls cos you have a better chance??

I'm not saying I'm pretty (and don't think that I am) but I want to know why on earth do men think that?




It's very simple. Walk up to a pretty girl and there's a fair chance you'll get shot down in flames because she's waiting on something better. Or that's the theory anyway.

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Postby *red* » Mon Jul 30, 2007 12:32 pm

Big D wrote:
*red* wrote:One of my mates did say that I am pretty and men find that intimidating WTF?
so you will only talk to ugly girls cos you have a better chance??

I'm not saying I'm pretty (and don't think that I am) but I want to know why on earth do men think that?




It's very simple. Walk up to a pretty girl and there's a fair chance you'll get shot down in flames because she's waiting on something better. Or that's the theory anyway.


Maybe but if they are like that then they are not worth bothering with
]I'm dyslexic and have trouble spelling. Please do not correct me.

I try my best...sometimes for you spelling nazis that is not enough

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Big D
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Postby Big D » Mon Jul 30, 2007 1:07 pm

*red* wrote:
Big D wrote:
*red* wrote:One of my mates did say that I am pretty and men find that intimidating WTF?
so you will only talk to ugly girls cos you have a better chance??

I'm not saying I'm pretty (and don't think that I am) but I want to know why on earth do men think that?




It's very simple. Walk up to a pretty girl and there's a fair chance you'll get shot down in flames because she's waiting on something better. Or that's the theory anyway.


Maybe but if they are like that then they are not worth bothering with.



And there's the second reason. Rightly or wrongly I expect attractive women to be fairly high-maintenance. The more good-looking= the more effort has to go into keeping them happy.
So, to recap: You've just come face to face with someone absolutely gorgeous. You aren't. You know that if you say hello there's a fair chance it will not go well. Or she'll tap you for a few drinks then stroll off.
Asuming you manage to start any kind of relationship there's always the fear she'll trade up for something better.
Or you could decide "Out of my league" and not bother in the first place.
Cynical and unfair, I know.

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Postby gelder » Mon Jul 30, 2007 1:13 pm

Big D wrote:
*red* wrote:
Big D wrote:
*red* wrote:One of my mates did say that I am pretty and men find that intimidating WTF?
so you will only talk to ugly girls cos you have a better chance??

I'm not saying I'm pretty (and don't think that I am) but I want to know why on earth do men think that?




It's very simple. Walk up to a pretty girl and there's a fair chance you'll get shot down in flames because she's waiting on something better. Or that's the theory anyway.


Maybe but if they are like that then they are not worth bothering with.



And there's the second reason. Rightly or wrongly I expect attractive women to be fairly high-maintenance. The more good-looking= the more effort has to go into keeping them happy.
So, to recap: You've just come face to face with someone absolutely gorgeous. You aren't. You know that if you say hello there's a fair chance it will not go well. Or she'll tap you for a few drinks then stroll off.
Asuming you manage to start any kind of relationship there's always the fear she'll trade up for something better.
Or you could decide "Out of my league" and not bother in the first place.
Cynical and unfair, I know.


Thats why all my girlfriends I've met through friends. They get to know you properly and vice versa before anything happens, so even if they are really attractive, you'll know if they're the kind of person who will just ditch you when someone better looking comes along. And as she has also goptten to know you, the chances of her doing this will also slim as she likes you for your personality aswell, not just appearance
Image

FUCKING SUCK!!!!

:p

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Postby *red* » Mon Jul 30, 2007 3:09 pm

Big D wrote:
*red* wrote:
Big D wrote:
*red* wrote:One of my mates did say that I am pretty and men find that intimidating WTF?
so you will only talk to ugly girls cos you have a better chance??

I'm not saying I'm pretty (and don't think that I am) but I want to know why on earth do men think that?




It's very simple. Walk up to a pretty girl and there's a fair chance you'll get shot down in flames because she's waiting on something better. Or that's the theory anyway.


Maybe but if they are like that then they are not worth bothering with.



And there's the second reason. Rightly or wrongly I expect attractive women to be fairly high-maintenance. The more good-looking= the more effort has to go into keeping them happy.
So, to recap: You've just come face to face with someone absolutely gorgeous. You aren't. You know that if you say hello there's a fair chance it will not go well. Or she'll tap you for a few drinks then stroll off.
Asuming you manage to start any kind of relationship there's always the fear she'll trade up for something better.
Or you could decide "Out of my league" and not bother in the first place.
Cynical and unfair, I know.


I get this with guys too.
They usually just turn to my mate who is prettier.

Keep trying though cos not all us gals are shallow
]I'm dyslexic and have trouble spelling. Please do not correct me.

I try my best...sometimes for you spelling nazis that is not enough

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Postby Lisa McNally » Mon Jul 30, 2007 4:17 pm

Can I just say that everyone's definition of 'gorgeous' can be different including the aforementioned 'gorgeous' person. They may think they are nothing special at all and wouldn't believe it if it was said to them.

Also, in my experience, a supposed 'gorgoeus ' person can be treated as a 'trophy' by some and therefore may be wary of romantic overtures full stop.

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Postby Drugged_unholy » Mon Jul 30, 2007 4:54 pm

*red* wrote:

Just chat to a girl. If I'm not interested I will still chat. I have made many good mates that way.
any you never know ;) if you don't try


except we'll get the wrong idea if you do still chat...

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Postby hairyscarymark » Mon Jul 30, 2007 8:47 pm

*red* wrote:I'm still single damn it.
Went out saturday all burlesque style, corset, stockings, long skirt... no interest.

Ummm Maybe I should just slum it in trainers and jeans.

One of my mates did say that I am pretty and men find that intimidating WTF?
so you will only talk to ugly girls cos you have a better chance??

I'm not saying I'm pretty (and don't think that I am) but I want to know why on earth do men think that?


Just chat to a girl. If I'm not interested I will still chat. I have made many good mates that way.
any you never know ;) if you don't try


I can't say I agree with other people on this. One of my favourite clothing styles for women is corsets, tights etc i.e goths. This would attract me to a woman. I have spoken to women in corsets before becuase I thought they were good looking and liked the way they dress. I didn't think they screamed sex at me at all. On most ocasions, they already had a boyfriend but I had some limited success on one ocasion with a girl ina corset.

I do think however some people would be put off by this.

Also, if you are hot, like yourself I think guys may not bother as they think you are 'out of their leauge' or something like that, as explained before. This is probably put across more by dressing in a particularly 'sexy' type way.

Good looking women = high maintenance on many ocasions or that is at least the conventional line of thought.

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Postby jello » Tue Jul 31, 2007 12:34 am

*red* wrote:I'm still single damn it.
Went out saturday all burlesque style, corset, stockings, long skirt... no interest.

Ummm Maybe I should just slum it in trainers and jeans.

One of my mates did say that I am pretty and men find that intimidating WTF?
so you will only talk to ugly girls cos you have a better chance??



oh dear

don't know you but if you think the best way to bag yourself a bloke is to dress in a certain way then you are sadly mistaken!!

if you do pull simply because of the way you're dressed it's gonna be on a very superficial pretext

try dressing in a way you feel really comfortable and just making the effort to talk to people you like the look of.

this may not provide the instant 'fuck me you're sexy' result that's instantly gratifying but

a) you might just meet some nice people that could prove to be future freinds (trust me you can never have enough of those)

b) you might just find that person who is interested in you and want you for who you are.

Trust me I work in a club where i see this stuff going on week after week the most popular girls are the ones that are just themselves and just out to have fun.

like i said I don't know you and i hope i've not caused any offence but really trying a little moderation may help your cause

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Postby hairyscarymark » Tue Jul 31, 2007 2:16 am

jello wrote:like i said I don't know you and i hope i've not caused any offence but really trying a little moderation may help your cause


Don't worry. I have been insulting her non-stop via MSN and she doesn't seem to have taken any serious offence yet.

On a more serious note, You are sort of right but.... Her description I think is actually what she wants to wear and how she feels most comfortbale dressing. She looks great that way so dillema makes no sense.

Can't complain there. If a woman enjoys dressing up for herself, not even becuase she wants to impress men. Doesn't get better than that really.

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Postby Bauul » Tue Jul 31, 2007 7:59 am

hairyscarymark wrote:On a more serious note, You are sort of right but.... Her description I think is actually what she wants to wear and how she feels most comfortbale dressing. She looks great that way so dillema makes no sense.


Ah but here is the dilema, because other people don't know that. They'll think she's dressing to scream 'sex', and you can't really walk up tp people are say "I know what you're thinking, but actually I wear this because I feel comfortable in it!". It'd be like meeting someone in a club with a boob tube, mini skirt and high heels and presuming they dress like that because it's comfortable. Ah the dilema.

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Postby *red* » Tue Jul 31, 2007 8:13 am

Thanks for all your words of advice.
At the end of the day I understand that wearing corsets and stuff can be intimidating and give off the wrong signal.
I only wear them occasionally (and usually with long skirt and an overtop) and when I feel like it. :)

Anyway no offense taken from anyone. I have some how come accross narrow minded and vain. But I'm not llike that at all (well I hope not)
Was just laughing at myself really, and the inabilty to pull no matter what I where, he he :lol: . Oh well.

Take care you all. :yes:
]I'm dyslexic and have trouble spelling. Please do not correct me.

I try my best...sometimes for you spelling nazis that is not enough