The Relationships Thread

[Applecore]

He also admitted that he knew, given my feelings, he could've "used the fuck" out of me but he values my friendship etc so didn't allow it.

Not sure I'd be comfortable hearing that from someone just so non-nonchalantly.

Yeah, obviously I don't know the guy, but to me that does kind of read "I could have done this horrible thing but I didn't and now I want you to see that as a positive about me". When really, it's surely more honorable if he were to have never even thought about that?

In a similar way, if you choose a mate over a boy/girlfriend, it's not exactly the done thing to then tell them.

[metalsam]

Thanks for the responses, they are genuinely helpful!

He is a bad influence IN A WAY...like the drugs. That's not something I'd have ever gotten into without meeting him, but I still enjoy it so that's more circumstantial I guess.
Drink driving was his fuck up and that doesn't really influence me in any way, but I dunno.

Dunno why I'm bothering to defend him, clearly I just need to make a decision here. It was nice to get some of that off my chest though, so thanks for the advice

The people you are with influence you (I say you but this applies to every human being) far, far, far more than you realize. This guy is a total fucking loser in a way that will harm others.

Get him out of your life ASAP.

[thehairyone]

LEG BREAKAGE SQUAD, ASSEMBLE!

[Danroush]

I can find someone the fittest person in the world one day, and then the next absolutely nothing.

That's the most bizarre comment I've heard in a long time. And a slightly depressing one.

Very much this, part of the reason I asked about it is because it sounds pretty horrible to be on the receiving end of

[Noodle]

Thanks for the responses, they are genuinely helpful!

He is a bad influence IN A WAY...like the drugs. That's not something I'd have ever gotten into without meeting him, but I still enjoy it so that's more circumstantial I guess.
Drink driving was his fuck up and that doesn't really influence me in any way, but I dunno.

Dunno why I'm bothering to defend him, clearly I just need to make a decision here. It was nice to get some of that off my chest though, so thanks for the advice

I couldn't hear the rest of that over the deafening noise of the FUCKING ALARM BELLS.

Drop him like a burning piece of toast straight from the toaster in the morning!

[Applecore]

Then set fire to the house and run screaming like it had a spider on it.

[Bisset]

Annabel the best advice I can give is get him tae fuck, right now. You're saying that when you write it down he looks bad news, well yes it does. Does not writing it down make him seem better? The guy seems like an utter spam javelin.

[Nichrome]

Thanks for the responses, they are genuinely helpful!

He is a bad influence IN A WAY...like the drugs. That's not something I'd have ever gotten into without meeting him, but I still enjoy it so that's more circumstantial I guess.
Drink driving was his fuck up and that doesn't really influence me in any way, but I dunno.

Dunno why I'm bothering to defend him, clearly I just need to make a decision here. It was nice to get some of that off my chest though, so thanks for the advice

You should stay with him. You have a deep connection with him, and he sounds like a fun and exciting type of guy. Who knows how it'll all end up? Just give it a go and see. Can't be any worse than boring nights at home on your own in front of the telly.

[keera_envenomed]

LEG BREAKAGE SQUAD, ASSEMBLE!

Did someone say gratuitous violence? When do we start!

spam javelin

That's the best insult i've heard in ages

In all seriousness though, this guy is trouble and needs to be shown the door ASAP before he does start taking advantage.

[TheLotusEater193]

Well I've just texted him to tell him what the plan is...

No idea if I was meant to tell him or what, but I figured he at least deserved some kind of explanation. Safe to say I'm feeling pretty miserable now

[peypea]

Proud of you Mannabel <3 Can't have been easy, but you're better off without him. The worst people are the best charmers. They make you think they're lovely despite all the shitty stuff you know about them and then they end up royally fucking you up.
I think you did the right thing.

[Jage]

you've got to get out there and bring home the bacon, if a jobs worth doing, it's worth doing right. these kinds of people do exactly what they say on the tin. at the end of the day, it it's the end of the day.

[Danroush]

Had another long and depressing dream involving my ex I try everything to push her out of my mind and then my body responds by making me dream about her instead. I really wish she hadn't blocked me on fb without even bothering to read the last message I sent (with a request that she just reply with "ok" to show she'd read it if she didn't want to reply fully).

[herzeleid]

I sort of realised as I typed that that it makes him come across as a dick, so yeah. The thing is, if I put all his problems down on paper (he's more or less a coke addict, he can't drive because he got caught drink driving, he's recently had to cut off his bank account because he developed a problem with online gambling..) then of course he's a massive douche. His personality is massively similar to mine too so I know he's a bad influence, because it's got me into a lot of these things.

BUUUT if you met him, he's so SO likeable. And whenever i'm stuck, no matter what it is, can call him up and he pretty much does whatever he can to sort it out. I think I rely on him too much now, so cutting him off seems really scary

Ah this is classic. I want every man who feels bitter about the relationship choices women make to read this just to see their expression!

"Well, he's a cokehead degenerate gambler who drink drives, but he's soooo charming!"

...He hasn't got you into snorting cocaine has he?

Either way, take the emotional hit and save your future.

[fluffymoo]

Gandalf has some good points here. I understand that the guy can be likeable when he gets all charming and nice, but you have to remember that they've learned how to be like that so they can get by on using people.

My parents have had plenty of friends just like him, it has always ended in tears.