The Relationships Thread

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Jim » Thu Apr 12, 2012 8:14 pm

Watching Peter Kay jsut reminded me, the easiest way to practice shitty small talk is with taxi drivers. They're always chatty about the most menial of things.
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Littlemissmetal » Thu Apr 12, 2012 8:15 pm

siliconfury wrote:Watching Peter Kay jsut reminded me, the easiest way to practice shitty small talk is with taxi drivers. They're always chatty about the most menial of things.


Friendliest taxi driver in the world ever works for Ebor in York :D
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby VirginInvader » Thu Apr 12, 2012 9:30 pm

I'm starting to get the feeling that a female friend I ran into at the pub last night for the first time in ages wants to be more than friends. Which is pretty awkward, if mildly amusing as this sort of thing almost always work the other way round :lol: Pretty ironic in a way too, as a few months ago I might have actually been interested.
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby TheLotusEater193 » Thu Apr 12, 2012 9:37 pm

jackcake wrote:I'm shy because I can't talk, rather than the other way around if that makes sense. Little comes to mind and I can't put thoughts into words*. It's hard enough talking to people I know - even girlfriends struggled to get much conversation out of me - let alone talking to strangers.

* It took me half an hour to write this.

Once again, i'm pretty much the same as this. Although I don't fuss over things on the internet like that, I really only worry about face to face conversations.

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby HollyTheHeadbanger » Thu Apr 12, 2012 11:26 pm

I'm either really chatty or just sit back and watch/listen, so sometimes come across as an arrogant fuck... when I actually just don't feel like talking/have anything of relevance to say at the moment in time. It really does depend on the company, but yeah. I've no problems with my confidence and my people-skills have increased loads since I started my job. It's all very one on one, and serving a customer can take a while... and I've had some of the best conversations ever with complete strangers.

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby V-Man » Thu Apr 12, 2012 11:41 pm

Nantha wrote:put me in a room with a load of 'normal' people


If there is one thing I always try to avoid, especially in the company of people who have similar interests it's discussing my own. I can't stand those "metal" conversations you have with likewise "metal" people, they are always so boring and repetitive. It seems as if the only time anyone ever brings the subject up - especially in the presence of someone they don't know very well is to try and kick off a game of subtle oneupmanship. It's the same with people who class themselves as "musicians". More commonly with the latter the people who bring it up most are the ones with no actual clue what they are on about, people who actually understand the subject tend to stay pretty quiet about it.

The friends I've made through here are the only "metal" people I've ever really sought out, by and large I find I'm way happier just talking to a few normal people that arn't all wrapped up their little subculture. Or at least when they are it's a different one to mine.
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Noodle » Thu Apr 12, 2012 11:59 pm

I understand where Steve's coming from here. I'm not the world's most chatty bloke. It's rare that I can get the that point of comfort and ease where I can become a sarcastic git and relax. Then again, I'm of the opinion that silence isn't a bad thing, and I tend to prefer to listen to the life story of other people. You never know what you might learn just by keeping your mouth shut, and the tendency to offend decreases by a heavy margin. The only time my patience runs a little short is if the subject is mostly drugs or football, of which I don't have enough passing interest to continue listening to.
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Nantha » Fri Apr 13, 2012 12:19 am

I was at a friends house a while ago and sober, and there were several people I didn't know there.
One girl kept coming out with the most stupid retarded shit I have ever heard in my life, for example, we were playing the 'name game' and someone would ask her to name a Prime minister and she couldn't name a single one. :|
Every time she came out with something thick, everyone else either didn't realise (because they wern't so bright either) or laughed because it was 'cute'. I tried to correct her a few times in polite gesture but in the end I felt myself getting so angry I just had to make my excuses and leave. I came to the conclusion that day that I am just generally not very tolerant of stupid people, and just can't get along with them at all.

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby VirginInvader » Fri Apr 13, 2012 12:20 am

V-Man wrote:
Nantha wrote:put me in a room with a load of 'normal' people


If there is one thing I always try to avoid, especially in the company of people who have similar interests it's discussing my own. I can't stand those "metal" conversations you have with likewise "metal" people, they are always so boring and repetitive. It seems as if the only time anyone ever brings the subject up - especially in the presence of someone they don't know very well is to try and kick off a game of subtle oneupmanship. It's the same with people who class themselves as "musicians". More commonly with the latter the people who bring it up most are the ones with no actual clue what they are on about, people who actually understand the subject tend to stay pretty quiet about it.

The friends I've made through here are the only "metal" people I've ever really sought out, by and large I find I'm way happier just talking to a few normal people that arn't all wrapped up their little subculture. Or at least when they are it's a different one to mine.

Yeah I hear you on that man. I hate that term "normal people" too. Am I somehow not a regular bloke because I listen to the odd bit of metal? Fuck that like. I hate talking about music with anybody anyhow, whether they like metal or not. Every other sentence is "yeah I only liked their demo" or "have you heard <shitty obscure band that recorded two songs in their garage and released them on a limited run of 4 cassettes>". It's fucking ridiculous. I go out of my way to avoid having a discussion about music unless I'm really stuck for topics. Give me a nice chinwag about fucking, fighting or footie any day :lol:
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Littlemissmetal » Fri Apr 13, 2012 6:18 am

Nantha wrote:I came to the conclusion that day that I am just generally not very tolerant of stupid people, and just can't get along with them at all.


I think you can conclude from this that you're probably pretty normal - most people are riled by stupidity, whether they admit it is another thing entirely though!

I take Tim's point too actually - sometimes it's much more interesting to talk to people about something other than common interests, and music tends to be an irritating topic for all those reasons Graeme pointed out - too many people seem to view it in terms of "right and wrong" rather than different tastes - there's nothing more infuriatingly pointless for me than arguing about music.

I really enjoy learning and you never know what new subject someone may bring up in the course of conversation if you steer clear of those subjects.
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Nantha » Fri Apr 13, 2012 9:32 am

I've talked to my fair share of folks I don't really have much in common with and I can safely say I prefer chatting to those whom I do.
Usually because it goes something like 'So where did you go to uni?' (safe answer) 'What did you study?' (moderately safe answer) and then 'oh so what music do you like' (met with either a smirk or blank face), and 'where do you go out at night' (met with absolute horror) :lol:
I remember explaining to a girl at work once that the blister on my hand was from pole dancing and she looked like she was about to keel over. When I do talk to 'normal' people nowadays I tend to leave out a fair chunk of personality and interests because for someone that doesn't know about things like metal, modelling and whatever else, I am seen as a slut of Satan.

The one thing I thought I could talk to the average British person about was Eastenders, nope, I think I'm the only person that watches it :(

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Slayer-ov-orcs » Fri Apr 13, 2012 9:34 am

Man two people I know have been flirting over facebook for about 3 months now, it's pissing me off.
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Ndnd » Fri Apr 13, 2012 10:39 am

VirginInvader wrote:
V-Man wrote:
Nantha wrote:put me in a room with a load of 'normal' people


If there is one thing I always try to avoid, especially in the company of people who have similar interests it's discussing my own. I can't stand those "metal" conversations you have with likewise "metal" people, they are always so boring and repetitive. It seems as if the only time anyone ever brings the subject up - especially in the presence of someone they don't know very well is to try and kick off a game of subtle oneupmanship. It's the same with people who class themselves as "musicians". More commonly with the latter the people who bring it up most are the ones with no actual clue what they are on about, people who actually understand the subject tend to stay pretty quiet about it.

The friends I've made through here are the only "metal" people I've ever really sought out, by and large I find I'm way happier just talking to a few normal people that arn't all wrapped up their little subculture. Or at least when they are it's a different one to mine.

Yeah I hear you on that man. I hate that term "normal people" too. Am I somehow not a regular bloke because I listen to the odd bit of metal? Fuck that like. I hate talking about music with anybody anyhow, whether they like metal or not. Every other sentence is "yeah I only liked their demo" or "have you heard <shitty obscure band that recorded two songs in their garage and released them on a limited run of 4 cassettes>". It's fucking ridiculous. I go out of my way to avoid having a discussion about music unless I'm really stuck for topics. Give me a nice chinwag about fucking, fighting or footie any day :lol:


Bloody this! I know loads of people into similar music and rarely talk about music with them. I will sometimes stretch to 'So who do you think will headline Bloodstock? or who was highlight of weekend? '

No idea what I actually talk to people about, but seem to always have something to laugh about and something to say.

I have always kept personal life away from people I work with professionally, unless they are part of it. I remember asking my manager to leave early one night to go to a gig, she was asking me loads of questions about it and seemed quite shocked I was part of anything like that 'Will you get headbutted?' After work I changed in the loos and wore what I usually wear and went downstairs to say buy and she looked as though she was going to faint (I don't even dress 'metulz' )
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby i_am_a_viking » Fri Apr 13, 2012 10:39 am

Nantha wrote: When I do talk to 'normal' people nowadays I tend to leave out a fair chunk of personality and interests


I feel I do this too nowadays. Especially when talking about what I do at Uni I feel like 'oh here we go again...' because barely anyone understands what it is. They instantly associate it with buildings and architecture or immediately say "OH LIKE TIME TEAM?!" Then when I do get round to telling them they're either not interested in the slightest or continue to be clueless.

Then again when I don't feel comfortable around folks I do tend to gabble and sometimes my sentences probably don't even make sense haha xD
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Fjar » Fri Apr 13, 2012 10:59 am

i_am_a_viking wrote:
Nantha wrote: When I do talk to 'normal' people nowadays I tend to leave out a fair chunk of personality and interests


I feel I do this too nowadays. Especially when talking about what I do at Uni I feel like 'oh here we go again...' because barely anyone understands what it is. They instantly associate it with buildings and architecture or immediately say "OH LIKE TIME TEAM?!" Then when I do get round to telling them they're either not interested in the slightest or continue to be clueless.

Then again when I don't feel comfortable around folks I do tend to gabble and sometimes my sentences probably don't even make sense haha xD


The majority of people are quite interested when I talk about what I studied at uni. When I accepted my offer I expected to have to deal with "Lol what a shite degree. Are you 5 or something?" forever, but most people say it sounds awesome and that they would have done it themselves.

When meeting family friends (like at my mum's wedding etc) or co-worker's partners at company parties, talking about work and 'where-your-life-is-going' tends to be standard. People want to know what you do, who that long-haired Scottish bloke standing next to you is and your career aspirations. I'm assuming that's generic small talk and not just nosiness though. :lol:
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