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Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 7:55 pm
by Fjar
'Partner' reminds me of some kind of team building exercise. I just picture people high-fiving when they talk about their 'partner'. Dunno why.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 8:02 pm
by Noodle
"Hi, this is *name*. I'm fucking him/her".

That works, right?

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 8:03 pm
by Andrewhall28
Noodle wrote:"Hi, this is *name*. I'm fucking him/her".

That works, right?


what if you're catholic :lol:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 8:07 pm
by Noodle
"Hi, this is *name*. I'm sleeping in the bed on the other side of the room to him/her. We're of the opposite gender, of course".

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 8:07 pm
by De Stijl
Andrewhall28 wrote:
Noodle wrote:"Hi, this is *name*. I'm fucking him/her".

That works, right?


what if you're catholic :lol:


Then you make sure the people you're telling don't have anything to do with the police.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 9:43 pm
by Kaahl
AnnihiSlateR wrote:
Dan Jenkins wrote:Relationships aren't objective by nature, people aren't robots :lol:

No, but the actions of people can be objectively viewed. If I kiss her, we kissed, there's no interpretation involved.
There's more room for objective analysis in our situation, but that's a story for another day.

I think thinking with my head and not my heart is perhaps a better way of putting it.


Perhaps stop thinking about it as an objective outsider and think about how it makes you feel.
Continuing your example of objectively viewing a kiss, you will also be able to consider whether or not you enjoyed it, whether or not you want to do it more, whether or not it excited you, etc.
Feelings and thoughts aren't mutually exclusive or necessarily at odds with each other, you just need to acknowledge the existence of both and find a nice common ground that lets you function best.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 9:34 am
by Delightful-Jim
Dan Jenkins wrote:Relationships aren't objective by nature, people aren't robots :lol:



I wish I was. I hate being sensitive and crap. I want to be an emotionless robot :(

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 10:58 am
by Moonburp
Delightful-Jim wrote:
Dan Jenkins wrote:Relationships aren't objective by nature, people aren't robots :lol:



I wish I was. I hate being sensitive and crap. I want to be an emotionless robot :(

Jim, you're a lovely guy. But man up :P

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 1:10 pm
by herzeleid
Stay the course Jim, women just love a complete sissy!

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 2:13 pm
by Purple n Batty
Noodle wrote:"Hi, this is *name*. I'm fucking him/her".

That works, right?


Well, that worked last December when I told my sister about you whilst we were working up a hangover in Ely, "by the way I'm fucking..." :lol:

I think people think too much about relationships and what they want/expect to happen and putting time lines on it all. I much prefer just hanging out with someone, seeing what happens, trusting your instincts and letting it flow along naturally whilst at the same time building a great friendship and trust between you both instead of all the dating bollocks and making plans for the future which go tits up.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 2:39 pm
by Jobdone
My favourite kind of relationship is stockholm syndrome.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 3:38 pm
by Kaahl
Purple n Batty wrote:I think people think too much about relationships and what they want/expect to happen and putting time lines on it all. I much prefer just hanging out with someone, seeing what happens, trusting your instincts and letting it flow along naturally whilst at the same time building a great friendship and trust between you both instead of all the dating bollocks and making plans for the future which go tits up.


Absolutely this.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 4:24 pm
by ollie123w
Purple n Batty wrote:I think people think too much about relationships and what they want/expect to happen and putting time lines on it all. I much prefer just hanging out with someone, seeing what happens, trusting your instincts and letting it flow along naturally whilst at the same time building a great friendship and trust between you both instead of all the dating bollocks and making plans for the future which go tits up.


smart!

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 5:06 pm
by Dan Jenkins
.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2012 5:31 pm
by AnnihiSlateR
Kaahl wrote:
AnnihiSlateR wrote:
Dan Jenkins wrote:Relationships aren't objective by nature, people aren't robots :lol:

No, but the actions of people can be objectively viewed. If I kiss her, we kissed, there's no interpretation involved.
There's more room for objective analysis in our situation, but that's a story for another day.

I think thinking with my head and not my heart is perhaps a better way of putting it.


Perhaps stop thinking about it as an objective outsider and think about how it makes you feel.
Continuing your example of objectively viewing a kiss, you will also be able to consider whether or not you enjoyed it, whether or not you want to do it more, whether or not it excited you, etc.
Feelings and thoughts aren't mutually exclusive or necessarily at odds with each other, you just need to acknowledge the existence of both and find a nice common ground that lets you function best.

I know. But at times I find it hard to feel. A lot of the time I just feel a sort of void inside where I know emotion should be, and it's annoying really as I know I should be feeling something. But there's been times when she's cried and it's had no effect on me whatsoever. To me, the situation didn't warrant crying and it's like I can't feel anything if I don't deem it worth the emotion in the first place if that makes sense?