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Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 12:10 pm
by *red*
Ulfrinn wrote:I once went out with someone and only saw them once within six months, before the relationship collapsed. Saw them before that, but distance fucks things up.

I think I'm finally getting to grips with being single, since it allows me to look like how I want to look.



Being with someone should not change how you look or how you want to look hunny.

Just be yourself and one day someone will accept you for that.

Been single for 2 years because guys don't seem to like my hyperness and love of gigs but I will not change for anyone.

Tried long distance but I cannot do it.
Works for some, just not for me!

Afraid though that I will get used to my freedom and end up being a crazy cat lady..........hang on, I am crazy, live alone, and have a cat. Looks like I am al;ready there.

Oh well.

:lol: :D

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 12:17 pm
by HouShian
*red* wrote:
Ulfrinn wrote:I once went out with someone and only saw them once within six months, before the relationship collapsed. Saw them before that, but distance fucks things up.

I think I'm finally getting to grips with being single, since it allows me to look like how I want to look.



Being with someone should not change how you look or how you want to look hunny.

Just be yourself and one day someone will accept you for that.

Been single for 2 years because guys don't seem to like my hyperness and love of gigs but I will not change for anyone.

Tried long distance but I cannot do it.
Works for some, just not for me!

Afraid though that I will get used to my freedom and end up being a crazy cat lady..........hang on, I am crazy, live alone, and have a cat. Looks like I am al;ready there.

Oh well.

:lol: :D


sounds about right, last girl i was with when ever i went to a gig, she would want me to stand there and hold her stuff.... yea.... sorry i like being in the pit.... i am just gonna sit around and await till i stumble across some one who can accept me like i am! (dimwitted, easily confused, and loves sugar!)

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 12:29 pm
by Lisa McNally
Distance works if you want it to. Lee and I have lived separately for 3.5 years and it works because we make the effort. We see each other about once or twice a month, and then for about 2 or 3 days at a time. We can't move in together for various reasons, we have totally different work patterns so we have to work round that too and we live about 200 miles apart! Lee does all the driving due to my family commitments. He's a bit of a hero! I like it as it means I have my own space too ... and it means that I can spend periods of isolation as a cat lady too! I have 3 cats ... and a chinchilla ... and an 11 year old! :lol:

I don't think it would work for some. I understand that our relationship is pretty unique ... but just to show it can work sometimes depending on what you want and what you expect from a relationship. :)

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 1:00 pm
by HouShian
dragonmaiden wrote:Distance works if you want it to. Lee and I have lived separately for 3.5 years and it works because we make the effort. We see each other about once or twice a month, and then for about 2 or 3 days at a time. We can't move in together for various reasons, we have totally different work patterns so we have to work round that too and we live about 200 miles apart! Lee does all the driving due to my family commitments. He's a bit of a hero! I like it as it means I have my own space too ... and it means that I can spend periods of isolation as a cat lady too! I have 3 cats ... and a chinchilla ... and an 11 year old! :lol:

I don't think it would work for some. I understand that our relationship is pretty unique ... but just to show it can work sometimes depending on what you want and what you expect from a relationship. :)



good to know long term relationshiops do work out,

for my they dont as i personally feel if i am with some one i would like to be around them without having to travel XXX miles, but that is from my personal point of view, (and mostly cause i cant get time of work and i dont drive :P)

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Tue Jul 29, 2008 7:40 pm
by misshyde
Aye, long distance does work. My uncle lives in Oz and his fiancee is back in the UK, and as far as I know they're doing alright :)

Which is good...the guy I really like is moving to Egypt :( so I'd like to have faith in long distance relationships.

Now I just have to get into a relationship with him... :-/

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Tue Jul 29, 2008 7:48 pm
by moongoosedani
I had a long distance relationship once. I'd travel 8 hours down to see her every week after work, spend the weekend and travel home on the sunday. Did it for about 6 months before it became too much and I just abandoned my whole life up here to live down there with her. And I enjoyed it!
After 6 years years of living together though it ended badly, so I'm not sure whether to encourage long distance relationships or not..

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Tue Jul 29, 2008 8:37 pm
by Matty_the_Emo_Slayer
My girlfriend lost her job today. She was temping at an accountancy firm. Some guy called her fat, she called him a paki. Fair enough really. I like a girl who doesn't take any shite.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Tue Jul 29, 2008 10:52 pm
by Dan Jenkins
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Wed Jul 30, 2008 7:48 am
by *red*
Dan Jenkins wrote:Long distance hasn't worked for me in the past because I disliked the way spending time together had to be planned. It's so much nicer to share time on short notice/spontaneously, I just find it more relaxed and a better atmosphere mostly. When I was only seeing a girl a couple of days a month it almost felt like pressure to use the time well and not waste it (which should be a given all the time I know hehe) and it was unpleasant.



Exactly.

I have tried long distance.
First an hour away
Second in london.
Neither worked because I like to do things spare of the moment and go to random gigs and stuff. If your planning to meet someone it sort of stops that. I remember planning to see the guy in swansea and knowing that my mates were going out in cardiff and wanting to be with them more.

I think it would work if you already have an established relationship as you already know eachother and have had the cuddly moments. When starting to know someone I like the cuddle moments, the random meetings, the lunch dates and that's hard if you live far away. But alas no-one in cardiff likes me so I surpose long distance it better than nothing :(

Plus one guy wanted me to stop seeing my mates to see him. Now call me selfish but I would never isolate myself in a couple and ignore my friends. I have mates that do that and am understanding but sometimes it sucks when they don't contact you for months then as soon as they break up they can't get enough of me.

Ohh I sound so bitter :o

I am not- I love it when people get together- love can be so sweet (ahhh ruined my hard core gothic image!!)

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Wed Jul 30, 2008 8:44 am
by i_am_a_viking
*red* wrote:Plus one guy wanted me to stop seeing my mates to see him. Now call me selfish but I would never isolate myself in a couple and ignore my friends.



That doesn't make you selfish though! That makes him selfish.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 5:32 am
by jackcake
I've been seeing someone for the last six weeks or so and things seem to be going well. I like her but I'm reluctant to get too attached - my last girlfriend ruined me when she ended the relationship. That still hurts and I'm frightened of it happening again. I don't think I'll ever get over that and it's a bit shit because it keeps coming up in conversation. I hate my ex, which makes things all the more annoying and confusing.

But it's nice to have someone around to do little nice things for again. It was her birthday on Sunday. She was up here visiting me in the week so I posted a card so it would be waiting for her when I drove her home on Saturday morning. I wrote it all in Welsh. :)

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 7:10 am
by Rob Bannister
jackcake wrote:I've been seeing someone for the last six weeks or so and things seem to be going well. I like her but I'm reluctant to get too attached - my last girlfriend ruined me when she ended the relationship. That still hurts and I'm frightened of it happening again. I don't think I'll ever get over that and it's a bit shit because it keeps coming up in conversation. I hate my ex, which makes things all the more annoying and confusing.

But it's nice to have someone around to do little nice things for again. It was her birthday on Sunday. She was up here visiting me in the week so I posted a card so it would be waiting for her when I drove her home on Saturday morning. I wrote it all in Welsh. :)


Just be yourself - if it's meant to be then it probably will be. :yes:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 8:15 am
by Dan Jenkins
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 8:48 pm
by thehairyone
Just going to put my own spin on long distance here, and I like spouting thie story.

I'm currently going out with a girl in Sweden. Between my house in Oxford, and her in Lund, we are just over 1000km apart. We've been going solid for 18 months now, since January last year. Due to my family (I can't afford my own place) and her age (she's a tad younger than me), I almost always go up to hers. It's fantastic - always a big hug and kiss at the train station, I get on really well with her parents and brotehrs and sisters (I'm helping her younger sister with her english lessons). We pay for alternate flights, and overall a trip rarely costs over £100, so I get to see her for a weekend/two night every four-five weeks or so.

What's managed to keep us going is not only that we fit well together, but another essential thing - communication. We both chat and do things together almost every night in World of Warcraft - it's how we met, and it's the single most important thing for keeping us together. The other is with heavy abuse of Vodafone's Passport deal so we can chat whenever we feel like it.

The key to any long distance reletionship is having someone you can do it with, and communication. If by some miracle you can get both... then you're sorted,a nd it's just as fulfilling as any other relationship. I've seen it work with other people as well - my friend's girlfriend from the USA has just moved over here to live with him, and he runs almost exactly the same way - they play EVE Online together and she has some call deal so she can phone him lots... long distance can work. It's hard work, but it does - so for anyone in one, don't give up hope!

Apologies for the ramble, too much vodka.

Re: The Relationships Thread

Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 11:17 pm
by wintermourn
who's up for gettin all the single guys and single girls in their own beer tent and forcing them to breed :twisted: lol


can also have a tent for ladyboys if needed xD :lol: