Perhaps it’s the good weather and longer hours of daylight but festival season and political marching season must co-exist and this year the two worlds are set to collide like no year previous.
Top brass and spokespeople within the English Defence League have stated their intention to march upon Bloodstock this August. Bloodstock, the self-proclaimed UK’s largest Heavy Metal Festival boasts some of the biggest names in the genre, but how many of these are invaders from overseas? That number is what’s riling up the right wing group and now is the time for them to take a stand apparently.
We stood up to the Vikings in the 9th century to defend this land, it seems like we’ve got to do it again in the 21st century
said one EDL supporter. The hordes these days are more interested in singing about pillaging and rape and shifting albums and concert tickets than actually practicing Viking-esque debauchery but the far right group don’t want to take any chances in defending our shores.
But what has really terrified the political group is the prospect of “black metal”
We don’t know what this is, but it sounds different, foreign and liable to take our lower paid jobs from us
BOA have said that black metal is performed and enjoyed by the palest people on planet Earth but the EDL are adamant of their need to stand and march against this unknown, almost certain menace.
Whether other festivals will likely to get the marching treatment only time will tell, “we’ll see how this protest goes and add more to the tour next year”, though they did express a fondness for Saxon so at least they’re not made of stone.
It’s been hard to get a hold of someone from the festival for comment but one supporter was heard to utter “at least they’re not rappers, go give them some grief!”
totally not a satire article..........