The Relationships Thread

[gelder]

[quote=Danroush]


This. One piece of advice I'd give though after seeing similar situations many times, is to give each other a little space through not meeting up too often, if just for a short while, to avoid things getting heated. If you try to jump straight from relationship to close mates it's often likely to cause problems, the most common being one or the other wanting to get back together when the other doesn't.
[/quote]

Very much this. This is what I've had a lot of problems with over the past couple of months. And she can't understand why I'm not her bestest ever friend when whenever we are getting on she says she wants to get back with me. Pfffft.

[Littlemissmetal]

That's really sad to hear guys but i'm glad you are going to stay friends

This - it's always nice if you can maintain a friendship

[Dan Jenkins]

.

[Bisset]

Well, I sent a last text to that girl basically saying "You, me, date?"

It's with the Gods now

EDIT - Fuck fuck fuck my goddam lack of spine and ability to actually grow a fucking pair sooner. She's "kind of seeing" someone at the moment. Why the fuck didn't I ask her on an actual date sooner? I always fucking procrastinate or put important things off for no reason. Well I feel like a toolbag #woeismetc

[Owen]

Well, I sent a last text to that girl basically saying "You, me, date?"

It's with the Gods now

EDIT - Fuck fuck fuck my goddam lack of spine and ability to actually grow a fucking pair sooner. She's "kind of seeing" someone at the moment. Why the fuck didn't I ask her on an actual date sooner? I always fucking procrastinate or put important things off for no reason. Well I feel like a toolbag #woeismetc

Hey, you did nothing wrong, it's not easy asking people to out, at least you did it. Now you just wait and see what happens, although to be fair you're probably best just focusing your attention on someone else for the time being.

[jackcake]

Been there myself of sorts. I was friends with this girl (still am) and travelled down to see her as such, but I was going to ask her out. I'd spent weeks trying to build up the courage then on the day when I got there she introduced me to her new boyfriend. Thankfully before I could embarrass myself.

It properly ruined my day, I came close to turning around and going home while their backs were turned but that would have made me look reasonably pathetic so I manned it out.

[Bisset]

Cheers guys, still feel like a proper tit though. Oh well, spinster it is

[peypea]

Today I went round a photographers house for a fitting. He left me in his house with the pc to go get another model from the station. Before he went out he said 'Oh you can use facebook and Spotify if you want, but make sure you log out of mine, I don't want people on my facebook seeing my Spotify and thinking something's wrong with me!'
When I enquired he said it's because I like all that 'dark, black music'. I said oh right, yeah I suppose you could call M83 and Kate Bush that

I don't get it, it's such double standards. I don't assume anything about people's music tastes, yet I constantly have people criticising and making fun of what they think I listen to... and they usually get it completely wrong.

Generally to avoid all that, I don't wear band tshirts and 'metal' looking stuff unless I'm out with like-minded people nowadays, I don't have the energy for that sort of judgement any more.

Bit late to the party, but even the people I live with have a similar opinion of me. If they actually bothered to properly talk to me or listen to the music coming from my room they'd have realised that most of my music is incredibly happy and awesome. The generalisations are ridiculous. One of the reasons why I'm looking forwards to moving out in June...

[Pazuzu213]

.

[Nantha]

Well yeah, obvious point there. I'd understand people laughing at me if I walked around wearing inverted crucifixes, corpse paint and 10 inch spikes, sure.
My point was it seems like it's acceptable to make fun of people who like metal (whether they dress alternatively or not), whereas it isn't for people into other music. But perhaps this is only from my experiences...
For example I wouldn't say to someone who liked hip hop 'oh lol where's your pimped out ride? Got any drugs nigga? Better not step on your white Puma's else you'll shank me bruv!'

[fluffymoo]

From what I gathered, it's not about people making the assumptions, it's about how they make them. People at work can be really mean about my music taste for no reason, whilst if I did the same thing to them they'd throw a hissy fit because they'd think I was being rude. I never bring up my taste in music, they've asked to have a listen to some songs that I like, and from there they've bitched about it for a year and a half now. I just think it's pretty immature for a bunch of 50+ year olds. If they don't like it, then don't bring it up. I'm kind enough to not blast any of "my" music at work, whilst I'm stuck listening to the same old songs from one of the hags' radio.

[Fjar]

Eurovision fans get it too. It's definitely not just metal.

[Pazuzu213]

.

[Nantha]

From what I gathered, it's not about people making the assumptions, it's about how they make them. People at work can be really mean about my music taste for no reason, whilst if I did the same thing to them they'd throw a hissy fit because they'd think I was being rude. I never bring up my taste in music, they've asked to have a listen to some songs that I like, and from there they've bitched about it for a year and a half now. I just think it's pretty immature for a bunch of 50+ year olds. If they don't like it, then don't bring it up. I'm kind enough to not blast any of "my" music at work, whilst I'm stuck listening to the same old songs from one of the hags' radio.

Yeah this was the point I was trying to make, you said it better.
Work is bad enough but I find relatives can be the most tiring with it. My sister (who actually used to listen to power metal like Sonata Arctica) will come into my room just to tell me what i'm listening to is shit (quite nastily as well sometimes) and I have NEVER ever commented on any of the crap she listens to.
When we were in Greece last summer I was listening to some Devin Townsend as everyone had gone out and I thought I'd just kick back and relax. When they came in, I think it was about 3 seconds before I had everyone making fun of me and shutting off the stereo. When I finally got angry my sister goes 'oh look how aggressive all that metal is making you' ugh

[VirginInvader]

I dunno, metal is pretty ridiculous though. I think it's fair game to take the piss a bit. Hell, I do it all the time and I actually like the stuff