The Relationships Thread

Put the world to rights here (off-topic discussion)
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Bisset
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Bisset » Thu Oct 17, 2013 7:53 pm

Jobdone wrote:Now taking donations to get me a bottle of vodka and sad songs.


That's one step away from listening to Sonata Arctica song where Tony's warbling about a burd he cannae get.

And yes the Glaswegian text was entirely necessary
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Jobdone wrote:Currently jealous of my mate whose got tomorrow off and can just hammer it for 3 days straight.

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Nantha
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Nantha » Thu Oct 17, 2013 8:25 pm

When I was 14 and listening to those Sonara Arctica songs I actually thought they were proper deep. :lol:

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Smindas
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Smindas » Thu Oct 17, 2013 8:32 pm

Kakko is clearly very unlucky in love. The one time I've seen Sonata Arctica, Twaddlefish and I just spent the entire set shouting "She's not worth it, Tony!"

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Jim » Thu Oct 17, 2013 8:44 pm

Bisset wrote:warbling about a burd he cannae get.

And yes the Glaswegian text was entirely necessary


That just reminds me of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NjukQapSD0k
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby jackcake » Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:00 pm

Smindas wrote:Kakko is clearly very unlucky in love. The one time I've seen Sonata Arctica, Twaddlefish and I just spent the entire set shouting "She's not worth it, Tony!"


:lol:

Three, four, five years. Whatever it's been, I'm still absolutely fine on my own. There are times when I miss the company but never the pressure of conversation.
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Jobdone
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Jobdone » Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:27 pm

Haven't got my dick wet in longer than I'm willing to admit.

The more depressing thing is that I'm totally fine with it.

I don't know if I even want to fuck at this point, I just want some chick who will sit with me and watch terrible movies and tv and talk with me about it.

I guess the idea is companionship you know. Like you see peoples parents, and they're both horrid, and you know they can't fuck. Both people are monstrosities. It'd be like slapping a frankenfurter into a meat grinder for 30 minutes and then no one ends up happy but they just keep doing it forever because what else are you going to do? You're too old to get someone else, and who cares at this point. You've got someone who will let you eat tuna in the morning and breath that shit near them, and they'll say they love you because at this point they do. Either you do, even if you don't, you have to. That's all you've got. Them and you and you spent 365 days every year not murdering them, and that's better than like anything else in the world.

I want to buy some polish bird and lock her in my basement until stockholm syndrome sets in and she understands why I did it, and then she sits there and asks me about ridiculous things like irony and how grammar works and I explain it and she slowly gets it but I can't ever let her out of the house because she'd have to explain to people what happened, and they won't get it, especially the fact i bought her because fuck yeah sex trafficing and I don't even need to put my willy in her but people will assume I did because who won't. I bought Aksana and she's got that eastern european bone structure, so of course If ucked her, and she'll be like "haha basement weesk" but they won't understand cos no one ever will.

So I'll keep her there, and we'll slowly learn to hate ourselves and never fuck and she's get frustrated and one day she escapes, and she fucks, and she comes home satisfied, and I'll know because I'll smell the cum on her when she's sleeping after drugging her late night milk which i've got her used ot drinking because everyone love routines and just sniff it and take a Qtip to it and get it tested and I'd know who it was and hunt them down, and take their arms, and their legs,a dn everything they owned and she wouldn't know but I would, but she would continue for a while and I'd kep doing it until she learned and then she'd be like "JUST FUCK ME THEN, I DON'T CARE" but I woulnd't be able to.

So basically, I'm going to die alone, and it's going to be jokes, I'm going to get like 8,000 cats, and fucking yolo etc.
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Alex. » Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:32 pm

Jobdone wrote:Haven't got my dick wet in longer than I'm willing to admit.

The more depressing thing is that I'm totally fine with it.

I don't know if I even want to fuck at this point, I just want some chick who will sit with me and watch terrible movies and tv and talk with me about it.

I guess the idea is companionship you know. Like you see peoples parents, and they're both horrid, and you know they can't fuck. Both people are monstrosities. It'd be like slapping a frankenfurter into a meat grinder for 30 minutes and then no one ends up happy but they just keep doing it forever because what else are you going to do? You're too old to get someone else, and who cares at this point. You've got someone who will let you eat tuna in the morning and breath that shit near them, and they'll say they love you because at this point they do. Either you do, even if you don't, you have to. That's all you've got. Them and you and you spent 365 days every year not murdering them, and that's better than like anything else in the world.

I want to buy some polish bird and lock her in my basement until stockholm syndrome sets in and she understands why I did it, and then she sits there and asks me about ridiculous things like irony and how grammar works and I explain it and she slowly gets it but I can't ever let her out of the house because she'd have to explain to people what happened, and they won't get it, especially the fact i bought her because fuck yeah sex trafficing and I don't even need to put my willy in her but people will assume I did because who won't. I bought Aksana and she's got that eastern european bone structure, so of course If ucked her, and she'll be like "haha basement weesk" but they won't understand cos no one ever will.

So I'll keep her there, and we'll slowly learn to hate ourselves and never fuck and she's get frustrated and one day she escapes, and she fucks, and she comes home satisfied, and I'll know because I'll smell the cum on her when she's sleeping after drugging her late night milk which i've got her used ot drinking because everyone love routines and just sniff it and take a Qtip to it and get it tested and I'd know who it was and hunt them down, and take their arms, and their legs,a dn everything they owned and she wouldn't know but I would, but she would continue for a while and I'd kep doing it until she learned and then she'd be like "JUST FUCK ME THEN, I DON'T CARE" but I woulnd't be able to.

So basically, I'm going to die alone, and it's going to be jokes, I'm going to get like 8,000 cats, and fucking yolo etc.



I'm actually very excited about the day when I die alone.
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TheLotusEater193
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby TheLotusEater193 » Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:21 am

Jobdone wrote:Haven't got my dick wet in longer than I'm willing to admit.

The more depressing thing is that I'm totally fine with it.

I don't know if I even want to fuck at this point, I just want some chick who will sit with me and watch terrible movies and tv and talk with me about it.

I guess the idea is companionship you know. Like you see peoples parents, and they're both horrid, and you know they can't fuck. Both people are monstrosities. It'd be like slapping a frankenfurter into a meat grinder for 30 minutes and then no one ends up happy but they just keep doing it forever because what else are you going to do? You're too old to get someone else, and who cares at this point. You've got someone who will let you eat tuna in the morning and breath that shit near them, and they'll say they love you because at this point they do. Either you do, even if you don't, you have to. That's all you've got. Them and you and you spent 365 days every year not murdering them, and that's better than like anything else in the world.

I want to buy some polish bird and lock her in my basement until stockholm syndrome sets in and she understands why I did it, and then she sits there and asks me about ridiculous things like irony and how grammar works and I explain it and she slowly gets it but I can't ever let her out of the house because she'd have to explain to people what happened, and they won't get it, especially the fact i bought her because fuck yeah sex trafficing and I don't even need to put my willy in her but people will assume I did because who won't. I bought Aksana and she's got that eastern european bone structure, so of course If ucked her, and she'll be like "haha basement weesk" but they won't understand cos no one ever will.

So I'll keep her there, and we'll slowly learn to hate ourselves and never fuck and she's get frustrated and one day she escapes, and she fucks, and she comes home satisfied, and I'll know because I'll smell the cum on her when she's sleeping after drugging her late night milk which i've got her used ot drinking because everyone love routines and just sniff it and take a Qtip to it and get it tested and I'd know who it was and hunt them down, and take their arms, and their legs,a dn everything they owned and she wouldn't know but I would, but she would continue for a while and I'd kep doing it until she learned and then she'd be like "JUST FUCK ME THEN, I DON'T CARE" but I woulnd't be able to.

So basically, I'm going to die alone, and it's going to be jokes, I'm going to get like 8,000 cats, and fucking yolo etc.

You won't die alone! You're hilarious which is a massive plus point for the ladeeez.

Also your first paragraph pretty much sums up mine and Jamie's relationship. We sit about in bed all evening drinking beer, watching shit tv and farting at each other. <3

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby metalsam » Sun Oct 20, 2013 7:11 am

Sounds like a pretty good setup!

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Fjar » Sun Oct 20, 2013 9:06 am

TheLotusEater193 wrote:Also your first paragraph pretty much sums up mine and Jamie's relationship. We sit about in bed all evening drinking beer, watching shit tv and farting at each other. <3


This is also marriage in a nutshell. Only difference is special rings.

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Smindas » Sun Oct 20, 2013 10:12 am

That Simpsons pic made me spit coffee with laughter. Oops.

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Nantha » Sun Oct 20, 2013 3:46 pm

Nawww, that's adorable Fjar :D

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Applecore » Sun Oct 20, 2013 11:48 pm

And again, I tell a girl how I feel about her and feelings are not returned.

Just as well, probably. It'd be awkward enough doing Peterborough - Durham where she's at uni, but she's from Florida and I'm about to spend a year in Australia..

Still, shit.
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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Nantha » Mon Oct 21, 2013 12:25 am

Applecore wrote:And again, I tell a girl how I feel about her and feelings are not returned.

Just as well, probably. It'd be awkward enough doing Peterborough - Durham where she's at uni, but she's from Florida and I'm about to spend a year in Australia..

Still, shit.


Sorry to hear it matey. Still, the distance thing is quite major, maybe it's for the best.

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Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby metalsam » Mon Oct 21, 2013 7:24 am

Applecore wrote:And again, I tell a girl how I feel about her and feelings are not returned.

Just as well, probably. It'd be awkward enough doing Peterborough - Durham where she's at uni, but she's from Florida and I'm about to spend a year in Australia..

Still, shit.


Sucks, but at least you had the balls to find out before you left :)