12 Angry Men is superb.
THE LOVE WITCHA sexy witch intent on finding love arrives in a small town, meets some other witches, and kills the occasional boyfriend. A great little throwback to the Technicolor occult themed films, and pulp romance novels of the late '60s/early '70s. Suitably wooden performances played with admirably straight faces, and lead actress, Samantha Robinson, somehow remains sexy even when handling a used tampon.
Devil worship, witchcraft, medieval renaissance fairs, songs, weddings, ridiculous costumes, stoic square-chinned cops, lots of bare skin, and colours so bright you'll think your eyes have gone wrong. Lots of vivid blues, reds, purples and violets give the film a real authentic feel, it's just a shame that they couldn't go all out and just set the film in that era.
"Do you know that most men have never even seen a used tampon?"
8/10
SKULL ISLANDExpanding nicely on the Godzilla movie from three years ago, Skull Island is set at the end of the Vietnam war and features Samuel L Jackson as a Colonel in need of one more mission. Hired by John Goodman and Heath from the Walking Dead, Jackson and his team escort a group of scientists, a war photographer (Brie Larson) and a former SAS operative (Tom Hiddlestone) are tasked with tracking "something" on a remote island hidden in the South Pacific.
No sooner do the team of helicopters make it through a huge storm cloud and into the island, than they are punched out of the sky by a gargantuan gorilla. Lots of minor characters die, and the survivors end up separated into two groups. The first, led by Hiddlestone, try to find a way off the island but get distracted by assorted monsters and fighter a pilot (John C Reilly) who has been trapped there since WWII. The other group, led by an increasingly Ahab-like Jackson, aim to kill the colossal ape in revenge for the loss of their men.
Whereas Peter Jackson's mess of a King Kong film failed to deliver anything other than a few nasty looking bugs, a list of mistakes so long it actually spawned websites dedicated to the film's many faults, and of course, the cure for insomnia, and 2014's Godzilla was frowned upon due to its lack of titular creature action, Skull Island really doesn't fuck about.
Monsters punch other monsters in the face. Monsters tear other monsters apart. Monsters eat humans, and monsters help out when necessary. Monsters, basically. Tons of the fuckers. Once on the island, the (very basic) story never interferes with the monster action, only slowing down a couple of times in order to set up the next monster punch-up.
The CGI ranges from adequate to incredible, John C Reilly steals the show, and some of the monsters are really quite superb. Forget the dialogue and acting, just watch monsters kicking the shit out of each other for nearly two hours and then stay for the post-credits sequence.
8/10