The Relationships Thread

Put the world to rights here (off-topic discussion)
User avatar
Podgie.
Hell Bent for Leather
Posts: 2803
Joined: Sat Feb 27, 2010 11:35 am
Location: London
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Podgie. » Wed Mar 03, 2010 3:02 pm

...after being stripped and raped?

User avatar
Fibbly
Hell Bent for Leather
Posts: 2350
Joined: Sun Dec 03, 2006 7:49 pm
Location: Leeds
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Fibbly » Wed Mar 03, 2010 3:24 pm

To be fair, the only "stalking" I had was from a guy I was kinda seeing/had been seeing and it could have been flattering if it wasn't so annoying. Things like sitting on my doorstep until I opened the door, and appearing in my back garden (which my bedroom overlooked and which backed onto a playing field), and 48 missed calls in an hour just drove me a bit mental after a while.
Although it was sweet that he didn't go to our leavers ball because it meant he wasn't going to see me again and he was too upset. If a little pathetic. Hoho.
He smelt like wet sand anyway.
If knowledge is a lactating mother- then I'm a very thirsty baby...

Amelia
Consort of the Beast
Posts: 443
Joined: Mon Oct 12, 2009 1:24 am
Location: hawai'i

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Amelia » Thu Mar 04, 2010 12:34 am

Fibbly wrote:He smelt like wet sand anyway.

:? how the hell does that happen?

User avatar
Smindas
Denim Demon
Posts: 7936
Joined: Wed Jun 27, 2007 10:40 pm

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Smindas » Thu Mar 04, 2010 8:46 am

He was a crab. A big, stalking crab.

User avatar
Cookie_
Denim Demon
Posts: 3326
Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 11:49 pm
Location: Nottingham
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Cookie_ » Thu Mar 04, 2010 8:49 am

Image

Oh hai thar!
Image
ImageImageImage

User avatar
Beardy
I am the Law!
Posts: 12340
Joined: Wed Nov 30, 2005 12:52 pm
Location: Over the hills and far away

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Beardy » Thu Mar 04, 2010 10:45 am

Smindas wrote:He was a crab. A big, stalking crab.

He was a paedo?

Image

Dr Fox wrote:Genetically, paedophiles have more genes in common with crabs than they do with you and me. Now that is scientific fact. There's no real evidence for it, but it is scientific fact.

User avatar
Darkweasel
Denim Demon
Posts: 14556
Joined: Wed May 30, 2007 10:08 pm
Location: Shakespeare Cuntry
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Darkweasel » Thu Mar 04, 2010 10:48 am

uber_scran wrote:Bullshit, I bet people who get stalked love every minute of it. Unless you eventually get strangled.

I married mine.
Tbf, she was a pretty crap stalker.
Image

User avatar
Fjar
Denim Demon
Posts: 10152
Joined: Tue Jul 21, 2009 12:22 pm
Location: Alfreton, Derbyshire
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Fjar » Thu Mar 04, 2010 1:45 pm

Darkweasel wrote:I married mine.
Tbf, she was a pretty crap stalker.


I wish I'd stalked James more, so he could say the same thing. :D
Image
Luke_X wrote:Got a ruler out and I measure it about 11 inches. Which pretty good value in my mind.

User avatar
Smindas
Denim Demon
Posts: 7936
Joined: Wed Jun 27, 2007 10:40 pm

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Smindas » Thu Mar 04, 2010 2:14 pm

Beardy wrote:
Smindas wrote:He was a crab. A big, stalking crab.

He was a paedo?

Image

Dr Fox wrote:Genetically, paedophiles have more genes in common with crabs than they do with you and me. Now that is scientific fact. There's no real evidence for it, but it is scientific fact.

God I love Brass Eye / anything to do with Chris Morris.

User avatar
Ndnd
Denim Demon
Posts: 6240
Joined: Thu Aug 07, 2008 6:24 pm
Location: Reading
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Ndnd » Fri Mar 05, 2010 6:35 am

I'm getting married in 7 months and you know something? I cannot wait :).

We have to decide on some boring readings for the ceremony (to bulk it out, else it'd only take a minute).

Does anyone here have any ideas of readings/poems / short extracts about love / relationships and gay stuff like that that we could use, I was thinking of something from Futurama, but couldn't think of anything appropriate, but your all probably way more creative.

Silly and cynical readings welcome too of course. There may be a pint in it for you.

I was reading one god awful reading earlier about a rabbit and something vibrating inside :eyes:
Mau Mau
Noodle wrote:Darkweasel, Kim or sig in 3.... 2...

User avatar
metalsam
Denim Demon
Posts: 3424
Joined: Sat Jun 02, 2007 9:25 am
Location: Bristol / London
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby metalsam » Fri Mar 05, 2010 10:16 am

What about Rachel's speech from the start of Friends? You could end it by saying that actually, you are a shoe. Or something from the Futurama where Fry moves the stars.

User avatar
Nantha
Denim Demon
Posts: 9264
Joined: Sun Jul 16, 2006 9:59 pm
Location: Twickenham
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Nantha » Fri Mar 05, 2010 4:44 pm

I just told the guy I was seeing to stuff it. He let me down yet again.
Fed up of being picked up and dropped whenever he fucking feels like it.
So yeah, no more.
Hamdir is officially on the prowl, and oh look, Paganfest in two days :B

User avatar
uber_scran
Consort of the Beast
Posts: 397
Joined: Thu Nov 15, 2007 6:05 pm
Location: Liverpool

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby uber_scran » Fri Mar 05, 2010 5:06 pm

Bellini wrote:I'm getting married in 7 months and you know something? I cannot wait :).

We have to decide on some boring readings for the ceremony (to bulk it out, else it'd only take a minute).

Does anyone here have any ideas of readings/poems / short extracts about love / relationships and gay stuff like that that we could use, I was thinking of something from Futurama, but couldn't think of anything appropriate, but your all probably way more creative.

Silly and cynical readings welcome too of course. There may be a pint in it for you.

I was reading one god awful reading earlier about a rabbit and something vibrating inside :eyes:


So it isn't a church ceremony?

User avatar
AnnihiSlateR
Denim Demon
Posts: 18654
Joined: Thu Oct 16, 2008 8:52 am
Location: Leigh
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby AnnihiSlateR » Fri Mar 05, 2010 5:09 pm

Bellini wrote:I'm getting married in 7 months and you know something? I cannot wait :).

We have to decide on some boring readings for the ceremony (to bulk it out, else it'd only take a minute).

Does anyone here have any ideas of readings/poems / short extracts about love / relationships and gay stuff like that that we could use, I was thinking of something from Futurama, but couldn't think of anything appropriate, but your all probably way more creative.

Silly and cynical readings welcome too of course. There may be a pint in it for you.

I was reading one god awful reading earlier about a rabbit and something vibrating inside :eyes:

Shakespeare - Sonnet 116

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

don't know if thats the kind of thing you had in mind?
The Inner Tent is Not Flame Retardant!
http://www.last.fm/user/annihislater18

User avatar
Ndnd
Denim Demon
Posts: 6240
Joined: Thu Aug 07, 2008 6:24 pm
Location: Reading
Contact:

Re: The Relationships Thread

Postby Ndnd » Fri Mar 05, 2010 5:20 pm

uber_scran wrote:
Bellini wrote:I'm getting married in 7 months and you know something? I cannot wait :).

We have to decide on some boring readings for the ceremony (to bulk it out, else it'd only take a minute).

Does anyone here have any ideas of readings/poems / short extracts about love / relationships and gay stuff like that that we could use, I was thinking of something from Futurama, but couldn't think of anything appropriate, but your all probably way more creative.

Silly and cynical readings welcome too of course. There may be a pint in it for you.

I was reading one god awful reading earlier about a rabbit and something vibrating inside :eyes:


So it isn't a church ceremony?


No. It's a Civil Ceremony at our venue.
Mau Mau
Noodle wrote:Darkweasel, Kim or sig in 3.... 2...