What made you Lol Today?

[Finnvitka]

I have no idea. I know Lady Gaga is something of a rather large heavy metal fan but I genuinely cannot think of a setting where she'd be in the same place as Saxon at the same time. Especially as it's clearly backstage and judging by her clothes it was her gig

[Smindas]

Maybe Biff's a big Gaga fan and snuck in.

[RedTeamWins]

I would so go to that tour.

[Turbo]

He blatently buggered her for his bus fare. Seedy sepia was a dead give away.




Silly old git showing the advantage of the senior citizens bus pass.

[Finnvitka]

[Jim]

Nabbed from another forum:


If you can read this without laughing, you must be devoid of laughter cells......

This was originally shown on BBC TV back in the 1970's. Ronnie Barker could say all this without a snigger, though God knows after how many takes.

The irony is that the BBC received not one complaint.
The speed of delivery must have been too much for the whining herds.

Try getting through it without converting the spoonerisms [and not wetting your pants] as you read.......

This is the story of Rindercella and her sugly isters.

Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion.

Rindercella worked very hard frubbing sloors, emptying poss pits, and shivelling shot.

At the end of the day, she was knucking fackered.

The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge, and the other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible huckers; they had fetty sweet and fetty swannies.

The sugly isters had tickets to go to the ball, but the cotton runts would not let Rindercella go.

Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared.

Her name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian.

She turned a pumpkin and six mite wice into a hucking cuge farriage with six dandy ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks.

The gairy fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnlight otherwise, there would be a cucking falamity.

At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when suddenly the clock struck twelve.

"Mist all chucking frighty!!!" said Rindercella, and she ran out tripping barse over ollocks, so dropping her slass glipper.

The very next day, the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the sugly isters let him in.
Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her leg and let off a fig bart.

"Who's fust jarted?" asked the prandsome hince.

"Blame that fugly ucker over there!!" said Mary Hinge.

When the stinking brown cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters without success and their feet stucking funk.

Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a knack in the kickers.

This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge halls and a hig bard on.

He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly.

Rindercella and the prandsome hince were married.

The pransome hince lived his life in lucking fuxury, and Rindercella lived hers with a follen swanny!

[Finnvitka]

"why walk all the way to London when you can make a fortune lying on your back?!"

[Big D]

The motto of the California Savate Association.

"We fight with shoes"

The mental image I now have is not, I suspect, what they were aiming for.

[NeglectedField]

Oh, St Sanders, I love you so *dies*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c9gwvjUc ... re=related

[Womble]

I'm home. Just had the best conversation ever with my Dad whilst we drank gin and tonics.
It basically went from politics, to war, to the war on drugs to me saying: "And yeah, I'll admit I've smoked marijuana" to my Dad replying:

"All I'm gonna say is that you're going to have to smoke a lot of dope to catch up with me."

[Kami]

Mainly Tim Minchin, but also waiting in a queue for 30 minutes for the ticket car park machine despite telling my brother three times that you could pay in the car on the way out, before five people from the front of the queue he over heard the NCP car park guy telling people outside and then decided to just go to the car instead.

[Moonburp]

Sweet Jesus That's a collaboration I'd like to see!

[jackcake]

[Dan Jenkins]

.

[CrapyMike]

i've been asking my department manager for a week now why we dont have any scratch cards at work, and reluctantly she told me this morning. before the shop opened, there was contractors in doing work around the shop all the time, through nightshift as well as during the day, and apparently one of them signed for the scratch cards when they were delivered and now the contractors are gone and nobody knows where the scratch cards are and we cant get more until we find them the funniest thing is, they reckon he's stolen them, but they need to be activated before he can use them so even if he gets a winning one trying to claim the money will just get him caught